So in the course of trying to get a date, one has successes and failures that shows him that repeating the actions is either a good or bad idea. More often than not, these actions come with a bit of ambiguity. Should you pay a girl a compliment? Should you ask for a first date on a weekday or weekend? Day or night?
But every so often I do something that says "No! Never do that again." This was one of those cases. As I spoke with a friend about New Interest S, I wondered what I should do if/when I get voicemail (I've always gotten voicemail when calling girls for the first time). She said that I was obviously calling to ask for a date and I wouldn't want to just trick her into calling me back, so should just casually ask on the voicemail if it comes up. It seemed like a logical idea at the time.
So now it's over a day later, and I've heard nothing. I imagine that if a girl who wanted to go on a date got the message, then she could find 3 minutes to call me back. Instead, I just induced the most annoying part of dating: being ignored instead of receiving a straight answer. In hindsight, the Voicemail Date was an awful idea. I should have just asked to be called back and if that doesn't work twice, then I'm done.
But really, does it matter? She's going to say no either way. It may be true that I just want my chances with a new girl to last, since I seldomly meet them. In fact, that's probably it, but I'm still not making the same mistake.
What about you? Do you have a certain method for asking someone out? Or do you let your phone go to voicemail when someone calls for the first time?
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I let it go to voicemail if:
ReplyDelete- I don't recognize the number.
- Don't feel like talking at that moment.
- Am nervous/shy.
I let it go to voicemail if:
ReplyDelete-I don't recognize the number
-Don't feel like talking
-Don't have service
I don't see the fault in the voicemail date. She knows why you are getting her number. If you had called and said call me back, you will probably get the same response. I don't give my number to guys, just so we can be friends. And if that's what she expected, that wasn't really what you wanted, so it saved you the awkward talk about a date.
I let it go to the voicemail because my phone is on silent 90 % of the time, and I don't know someone's calling.
ReplyDeleteBut, to be honest, if a guy's calling and I don't know him very well yet I pretty much assume he's interested and would take it to mean he want's to go out--even when he doesn't come right out and say it.
No response to your call can mean one of two things: (a) She's seriously really busy right now, and has been meaning to get back to you, but just hasn't had the time. (I've accidentally been read the wrong way w/ this one) or, more likely, (b) she's ignoring you because she doesn't want to have to tell you to your face that she's not interested.
Sorry, it's harsh, but I was also semi-rejected this weekend, and my girlfriend gave the best advice: He's not into you, so move on and stop beating yourself up about it.
This is much easier said than done, but it has to be done... and no one likes the people who don't seem to "get the clue" and just keep on trying after it's obvious that they've been rejected.