Credit Card Debt: It's a Bitch

Where Did It All Go?


Does anyone else here haaate owing money for things, but still can't stop buying worthless things? That's me. I have a condition called Non-Buyers'-Remorse. Basically, I'm never unhappy with crap I buy. It's always fun, and seemingly never a deterrent from the whole "I'll probably hate it in 6 months."

Well my condition has led me to amass a manageable, but larger than I'd like, credit card bill. The average credit card debt per household has been marked at $10,679! We've gotta get out of this mess. Being the super nerd that I am, I built a spreadsheet in Excel to forecast payments and find out how soon I can get my balance to zero. Right now, it's looking like my June 3rd paycheck will do it, but that means I absolutely can't buy any (more) items over $100 or so. I budgeted money for going out on the weekend, though.

After playing around with the budgeted numbers, I found that the June 3 date looked pretty steady as long as I paid 75% of my leftover paycheck after expenses. That means that the main thing killing me was randomly buying shoes/clothes/records when I was bored. I'll be pretty happy to be out of this debt because I saw how much I can save once I'm actually out of debt. Likely only to spend more....

Do you have a bunch of CC debt? What's your best idea to get out of it?

Ebay: You're Too Lazy

Since my roommate has a record player, I thought that it'd be fun to get one myself. Then I can live out my lifelong dream of DJing 2 person parties at home. So i hopped on Ebay, hoping I could find a cheap Technics. I saw a model that I was unfamiliar with, but it was listed at about $30 with 15 minutes to go. Sweet! So I bid on that bitch hoping to get a steal.

Out of nowhere, someone else started bidding too. I was determined to get it at a good price, so I ended up paying $50, which wasn't too bad. After a week, it just came this evening. I turned it on to find that not only was the audio messed up, but it wasn't direct drive as advertised. Super lame. So now I've got to mess with Ebay and ship it back so I can find the right record player.

The moral of the story: Even if you get screwed, it's kind of your fault for looking for such ridiculous deals.

This isn't to say that I won't continue to purchase from such an amazing site...

FYI

When your doctor tells you to get the staples in your head removed in 7 to 10 days, don't wait longer. If you wait 12 days, it will be wildly painful, and you'll curse at the clinic nurse taking them out.

Also, when you switch jobs, you need to sign up/pay for COBRA extended insurance, or you'll have to pay as if you never had insurance.

That is all

This Job Seems Way Better

So I've had this new job for two days now, and it seems a lot better than my previous job. I'm pretty nerdy, so that just means I get to do cooler finance stuff.

Also, I'm dating Mary now. I haven't really had a girlfriend in a while, so I'm not sure what feelings are normal. Mary's a great girl, and I like her, but I don't know if I could say that I'm crazily out of control for her. Is that weird? Or do people grow to become even more attracted to one another after time? For the time being, I think I should be all right, though.

New Year, New Job

Wow, I've got to start posting again. For both myself and you 5 to 7 people out there. Haha.


I've been lightly looking for a job since early November, but hadn't had much luck with Monster.com. It's a good site, but there are just a ton of people looking (as if you needed anyone to tell you that). In mid December I got a call about a company in the suburbs, so I went to interview. Within a week, I had an offer. It should be a good opportunity, so I'm pretty excited about that.

Coffee with Kayla went generally well, but I didn't really feel like our personalities matched. We've randomly chatted since then, but I'd be happier just being friends with her.

Instead, I've been seeing a lot more of Mary from Match. We have a similar sense of humor, and so far it's working out pretty well.

My match.com subscription is now over, so I figure I'll give a short review.
-If you're in match (or another dating site), it's a safe assumption you're not going on a ton of dates. So in this case (either if you're a guy or girl), just try to go on a bunch of them.
-Don't expect every person you email to email you back. Maybe about 10 to 20% will, in which case, you (again, guy or girl) should ask them out. It's online dating. No one cares about gender roles.
-The numbers are much more slanted toward females, but that shouldn't be a big deal.
-I think you get more comfortable "in real life" around people you're interested in.

So if you followed my other posts about match, I guess I kind of take them back. I think I went on about 6 or 7 dates over those 3 months. So for $60, it was worth it. Would I do it again? I don't think so.

It's 2010! Do you do resolutions (or keep them)? What did you do for New Years Eve? I went to Girl Talk and it was wild.

Updates Galore

It's been a while since my last post, but I've been keeping busy.

A Recap:

-The date with Heidi seemed to go well. We met at a not too pretentious wine bar and talked for a while before stopping at a diner for some food. When we parted, I didn't go for a kiss, but instead did one of those one-armed hugs. I thought the date went well, but that's debatable.

-Later that weekend, I figured I'd ask both Heidi and Dana on dates for the week. I got voicemail each time, which wasn't a big deal. I just asked if they wanted to get dinner/drink/etc on said night and to call back. At least one will call back in response to a date, right? Wrong. I still haven't heard back from either.

-Just before Thanksgiving, a coworker asked how online dating was going. I explained to her my lack of dates, so she posited that I'm not asking out enough girls. So given access to my account, my friend proceeded to send the same two sentence email to about 20 girls asking to meet for coffee

-Oddly enough, following a Flosstrodamus show on Black Wednesday (my favorite drinking holiday), I made out with a friend's friend at Debonair. Yes, we were all that drunk, and it's been quite a while since I've done that. The girl, Kayla, is pretty good looking, but we both don't know each other at all. So I'm reserving judgment until we go on a date.



Of the girls my friend asked out for me, I've gone on dates with three so far. One was pretty nice, but I wasn't really feeling it. The other, Mary, seems pretty cool. Our date lasted over 3 hrs, but was good conversation the whole time. I hope she didn't get bored, though. She seemed to have a good time, though, so we switched numbers and I asked her to get dinner Friday. So we're going to do that, which I look forward to.

The third girl was pretty cool, but I think I'd rather just be friends with her.

So that's where I'm sitting now. Tonight I'm getting coffee with Kayla. I'm avoiding drinking, because the last time we drank I ended up staying over. The main thing I'm worried about is if she doesn't realize that we might not be attracted to each other.

Am I Making a Mistake?

"I immediately regret this decision." or Do I?


Today I called Heidi. It had been over a week since I last called, and I'm attracted to her enough that I wanted to see what would happen.

Now in reference to my last post, you may think "I thought you deleted her number." Well, kind of. I deleted the contact, but there were still some text messages lingering around. So like the sap I am, I dug through the history to find her number.

Heidi answered, and after I gave an awkward sounding "So...How've you been?" she said that she got in a fight with a friend; Hence, no volunteering appearance. I think she was trying to insinuate that's why she didn't call back for 10 days also. Heidi threw in a quick "I was actually thinking about you today, and about calling to get a drink." I'm not sure how true this is. Could she just be asking me because she knew that's exactly what I was calling for?

So we're going to grab a drink on Thursday. I'm hoping that I'm wrong about her, and Heidi had a good reason not to call back. I won't find out until then, I guess. I just know that I definitely won't be trying to kiss her this time.

What do you think? Should I just meet up with her this once, but try to forget about her because she should have gotten back to me? Or should I give it a chance with a girl I have feelings for?

Compatibility

Lately, I've been having a hard time meeting a girl who I'm compatible with. Concerning the girls I've taken on dates, either there wasn't much chemistry, or I was blindsided by their non-interest (Heidi).

I've probably gone on more dates in the last month than I have for my entire life (quick check: True). So this is a bit more rejection than I'm used to. Now I get the feeling that no matter how much I may have in common with someone, I'll still just be viewed as their Platonic friend.

For instance, my roommate had a good female friend visit for the weekend. Coincidentally, she has the same name as Heidi, so she'll be Heidi2. I didn't end up going out at night with them, but the three of us did some hanging out in the apartment. I understand that there's no formula for true compatibility, but our common interests ranged from the broad (surfing & photography) to the obscure (fans of Le Tigre and the Modern Lovers). No matter what, I can't picture Heidi2 thinking of me more than some goofy friend. Granted, this is a broad generalization, but it gets difficult when it's not question of compatibility, but it's something I'm doing.

In addition to the recent complaining, I decided to start deleting all the numbers of girls who've stopped calling me back. There went Sevilla, Heidi, Dana, and others. At least I won't send any embarrassing late night texts.
I was hoping Dana would come through, but it doesn't look like it'll happen. After calling twice with no response, she sent over a text message asking my weekend plans. I mentioned that my friend Rob was having a party and said she and her sister could come if they wanted. She said, "Sure," and that she would call. Didn't happen, though the party was still a good time. So now that I don't have her number, I can't appear too pathetic by bothering her. She has mine, so if she wants, she can make the call.

In other news, I watched the move The Brothers Bloom this weekend (on DVD). It stars Adrien Brody, Mark Ruffalo, and Rachel Weisz. It's about two brothers who are con men, and Weisz is the latest/last mark. I don't think the movie got a lot of press this last year because it's another indie flick, but it was really enjoyable. If you're bored roaming around the video store or on Netflix, check that one out.


So what do you think about this whole business of deleting numbers from your phone? Do you think it's necessary or juvenile? I'm not sure at times, and I think I've had to get people's phone numbers a second time. Usually I make up some excuse like I got a new phone. Holding back on contacting people can be hard.


Oh yeah, I saw the Walkmen (a sweet rock band) at Lincoln Hall on Friday. Easily the best sounding venue I've been to so far. The show was great, as I went with Kumar and Jay. Too bad it's located in the cesspool that is Lincoln Park...

2 Days?

Over the weekend, I didn't hear from Heidi at all even though I called her on both days. Usually I would think that would be too much, but she typically returned my calls on the same day. I had just asked a friend how long she thought I should let a phone call go unreturned. She said two days. That's it? Is that the general concensus? It just seems so short. I was just beginning to like this girl and now I get to find out that she's not interested in me. Is this how dating is supposed to be? I've gone one two dates with the last few girls I've met and now they've fallen off the radar.

That leaves one left.
I don't think I ever wrote about it, but a few months ago I went to a friend's birthday party/drinkathon. Near the end of the party I chatted up a short girl with big bangs. I'll call her Dana. Unfortunately I drank too much and forgot to ask for her number, or so I thought.
Over the weekend, I added her on Facebook (yeah, I know), and asked if she'd want to meet up some time. No response. Not a huge deal, just another pretty cute girl.
Then comes last weekend when I got a call from the birthday friend (Kyle) telling me to go to a party in my neighborhood.
Well what do you know? It's Dana's apartment. And it's a Tom Selleck party, moustaches everywhere.
After saying hello, I kept the chatter to a minimum since I was still embarrassed about being the drunk guy hitting on her last time.
Near the end of the party, people were starting to get to some bars. Kyle went home with his girlfriend, so I thought it'd be a good idea to go home also.
As I was leaving, I decided to ask for Dana's number. I said "Dana, I'm just going to say it: I think you're really cute. Could I give you a call some time?" To which she replied "Um...you already have my number. And I have yours. See? I'll call you right now." What??? Is this for real? I was that drunk?

10 seconds later, my phone is ringing. Phone number's tagged as "[Someone not named Dana] Kyle's Friend." So apparently I've been sitting on Dana's phone number for two months without knowing it.

So that's the scenario. I'll try calling tomorrow to see if she wants to grab a drink. If not (meaning she lets the phone go to voicemail and doesn't call back), then I'm back to nothing.

What do you think about the Two Days guideline? Is that a reasonable amount of time to give someone to call back? Personally, I return calls that day if I'm interested and it's not too late. What about you?

Totally Confused

Me + Heidi?


Remember Heidi? Yeah, the cute, super smart girl I met a few weeks ago. So I've been thinking that she's at least a little interested. Reasons being she calls me back and laughs at my stupid jokes.

Well now I'm not so sure. This evening I went to see a movie with Heidi. Let's just say the movie was awful, but it made for a fun situation. We were literally the only two people in the room, so we could talk and do whatever we wanted.

I got dropped off at the theater so Heidi gave me a ride home. While being dropped off, I felt like it was a good idea to go for a kiss. Well let me tell you, it wasn't. Instead of the sweet goodbye kiss that one would expect, I would say that about 10% of our lips met and 90% of mine were on her cheek....again. I don't think it was any mutual awkwardness that led to the mix-up.

So that leads me to my wondering. Does Heidi just want a male friend who she thinks is funny? Who maybe does random weird cheek kisses?

What do you think? Is this logical thinking at all? I'm really interested in Heidi, so I have no idea what to do now. I know that I shouldn't tell girls that I like them, but now I'm at a loss. I thought that trying to kiss her would send the message that I'm interested. Apparently not. Maybe I should go back to 4th grade check boxes

Waiting on the Next

I can't get Heidi out of my head. Is that weird? I've only seen her twice, but there's something about her that I really like.

I took off of work on Friday mainly to relax, but I also hoped that Heidi would be free to meet up during the day. While trading voicemails, she said that she was feeling "under the weather." While I believed her, the phrase seemed stock. On the upside, Heidi suggested Monday instead, which I obviously agreed to. I left a message on Sunday to confirm plans, assuming she'd call back that night. Today, Heidi called about the date. It turns out that she has the flu. Heidi suggested that we meet Thursday instead.

So that's the tentative plan. For right now I'm just afraid that I may call or text too often. I don't want her to feel all awkward if she realizes that I'm much more interested in her than she is in me.

What is the balance like in relationships you've been in? Are you usually the more interested one or is he/she? Is it balanced?

A Good Date (I Think)

"I didn't know we were drinking for real" -My remark when Heidi ordered Maker's on the rocks

As I mentioned, last night I went on a date with a girl I met on Saturday. I guess it was your standard first date type of conversation: Where are you from?; What do you like to do?; etc. Besides her obvious cuteness, I'm really into the fact that she's a lot smarter than me.

Unlike my first date with Sevilla, I tried a more straightforward approach to asking Heidi to see her again. To this, she didn't answer immediately but said next week should work.

As I stood outside of her apartment building, I thought the date went well enough to try to kiss her. As I leaned in, as did she, my fear that she instead assumed she would be hugged arose. So then came the weirdest, most non-European kiss on the cheek, which led to me walking back to my car.

So now I know that I'm really interested in Heidi, but I still don't know what her feelings are. I have the day off on Friday, so I may try to call and meet up with her then. Think it's too soon?

Is there a general rule for how spread apart the first few dates should be? Currently, I'd like to see her pretty often, but I don't need her thinking it's way too much.

Another

I'm going out for a drink with a girl I met at a volunteering event this past weekend. She seems cool. Hopefully she will be. Also, I'm planning on calling Sevilla to see what she's up to for the weekend. I'll keep you updated...

Where the Wild Things Are, Where the Interested Girls Are Not

Tonight I went to see the aforementioned movie with Seville. Let me tell you: it's awesome. I'm not even some gigantic fan of the book, but Spike Jonze keeps rolling out the hits. Definitely worth seeing if you want to remember all of those uncertainties of childhood that make it so great. As publicized, it's probably not the best flick for kids just because they have to go through childhood in order to reminisce, right?

As for Seville, she also really enjoyed the movie, so that was a plus. Like last week, we grabbed a drink afterward to talk. Now I don't know if it's just me, but I don't think she's having fun at all. She laughs at the really stupid jokes of mine (not sure if it's genuine or faked), but I thought it would be more obvious if she wanted to see me again. This time around, I didn't say the blatant "This was fun, let's do it again," which I can only assume she was thankful for.

Now I don't have any wild crush on this girl or anything yet, but she does seem interesting, and she's definitely really cute. I wish I could just know what she thought. Of course I can't just say what I'm thinking--that would be too easy. It would take all that mystery away and make things logical. Instead, I've decided to just not call her again unless she calls me. If she calls and suggests something other than a date where I'd be spending money on her, then at least she doesn't think I'm a complete idiot. And if she doesn't call back (within say...a week/next Friday), then I guess I have my answer.

The lesson of the night was that you should never park your car at the AMC River East Theater because it'll cost you $30.


What are some signs of an interested girl? Tonight there was none of that leaning forward, flipping hair, motion-mirroring stuff that I've read online. And if those are the actual signs, then I guess I know then.

Lazy Weekend

I feel like last weekend was generally unproductive, but still fun. After mulling over the possibilities, I've finally gotten to work on picking an organization to volunteer at. Though it's sponsored by a church, I don't think that there's any religious slant, which I'm thankful for. In general, I'll be tutoring adults and kids in math. Sounds like a good deal to me. I'm looking forward to it.

Since I had to meet the organizer earl-ish on Saturday, I had to watch my drinking the night before. A friend's roommate had a birthday, so I dropped by that. The party was pretty standard: drinking, dancing, beer pong.

I couldn't rope anyone into seeing some live music with me on Saturday, so I went by myself to see Headlights. Despite the fact that they didn't go on stage until midnight (there were three openers), the show was pretty entertaining. The band seemed pretty fun, and they played a lot of songs I like.

So that was my weekend. Not too much boredom, no girls, nothing else. We'll see what the week has in store. I'm trying to get a hold of Sevilla to ask her on another date.


Have you ever gone to see live music by yourself? Or have you done anything else that you figure groups would do (restaurants/movies,etc.)?

First Date Aftermath

This date has taught me a few things.

1) I know why I've been having an awful time with Match.com
2) If you're nervous, don't ask how the date stacks up against other online dates
3) PJ Clarke's has good Margherita Flatbread


So I took the cab over to the art exhibit. Seville was waiting in the corridor. Without any drinks in me, she still looked really good, so that's a plus. The exhibit itself was actually pretty awesome. Some great photography and other paintings were shown, all with price tags out of my range. As we walked around, we talked about what most first dates talk about: School, work, friends, family, etc.

After the show, we decided to grab some food and a drink. I think the best part of the conversation was when we talked about the randomness of Match.com (and therefore any online dating site), and told each other how their gender seems represented. Apparently, most of the guys on the site are sketchy, and there are a ton of them. Seville said that she signed up at about 11pm or so. By morning, she had 35 emails. This wasn't the case for me. So if you're a girl, and you're somewhat thinking about online dating, I vote with a big Yes. You'll actually have options. As a guy, I think it's a big competition, one which I'm losing, to stand out.

The night ended with us splitting the bill, though I tried to get the waitress's attention while Seville was in the bathroom. As we were leaving, I thought that I should hint that I'd like to see her again. Prior to this, I was hoping to say something bold and confident like "When can I see you again?". Instead, all that came out was "I had a really good time tonight. Would you want to go out again sometime? It's okay to say no..." Needless to say, my confidence could use some work. So now I feel like I kind of forced her into saying Yes because it would be super awkward to say No.

Today, I'm trying to make something of the date, which leads us to "The Spark." You know, that feeling when you meet someone and think this person is really awesome and you definitely want to see them again. Well it wasn't there for me, and I'm not sure why. Seville has most of the characteristics I'm looking for, but I didn't feel it. I'm basically hoping that since she seems like a great person, things may fall into place and I'll have a better idea if I like this girl after more than one date.


So how do you think the date went? I give it a B, pretty much all due to me (for it being low). Have you ever had a good dating experience with someone despite the fact that the Spark wasn't initially there?

Date Night

Tonight I'm going on my first online-related date. If you want to get really technical, I actually saw her last weekend while I was out with friends. This girl, I'll call her Seville (she studied abroad there), seems pretty friendly, and she's realy cute.

I think that since we've already had a run-in (and she had drinken more than me), I'm under less pressure to be witty/funny/etc. Hopefully some of that will still show up and I'm not a complete drag.

The general plan is that Seville and I will meet at a photography show (apparently her father has a picture in it), and then it's up in the air. I think we both assume we'll grab drinks, but are there some other good options, even with this awful weather? As much as I love ice cream, I'm guessing that she won't be into it with a 30 degree wind chill.

Other than that, online dating isn't going great. I think that one more girl stopped emailing me, and I feel like I've gone through every single female profile of a cute Chicago girl (hint: they usually want a white guy over 5'11).

So at least I have this date. I have to say, it's been quite a while since I've been on one, but at least this girl will know where Wisconsin is.

Any last minute suggestions for an alternative to drinks?

Small Update

So the last time I posted, I endlessly complained about my distaste for internet dating. As of today, I'll have to dial it down a little bit.

My general plan for starting match.com was that I could try to meet girls in person while trying to meet them online. Well at first I was getting completely shut down (save for a Russian immigrant bride scam). In the past week or so, I've started to talk to two different girls, one of whom I made plans to meet for coffee this weekend. So that's good, right? Hopefully my general thoughts on the online dating scene will lighten up.

But wait, a little more good news. So my favorite cafe just closed down. You know, the one where the barista gave me free coffee. I hadn't been there in a few weeks, so when I went last Saturday, I was surprised to hear the news. The girl who served me was Free Coffee Girl. I thought that I should ignore the "Don't ask out the server" rule and just ask her on a date. In a few short hours, she wasn't going to be anyone's server, huh?

So as I left, I asked if she'd want to get lunch. After hesitating a few seconds (is that normal or weird), she said sure. Apparently I'm supposed to call this week to get something set up. I'm happy that I got the nerve to ask, but still nervous that I won't get a returned call. At least this time, I'll make sure I don't fully ask her on the date via voice mail.

In other news, the Packers embarrassed themselves, which is unfortunate for me. Also, I'm planning on volunteering for a weekend Adult Tutoring group. Should be cool and keep me out of too much trouble on Fridays.

So with these two potential dates, the options are lunch, date, or coffee. Which do you think is best for a first date? Or is there a better option?

Learning From Mistakes

So in the course of trying to get a date, one has successes and failures that shows him that repeating the actions is either a good or bad idea. More often than not, these actions come with a bit of ambiguity. Should you pay a girl a compliment? Should you ask for a first date on a weekday or weekend? Day or night?

But every so often I do something that says "No! Never do that again." This was one of those cases. As I spoke with a friend about New Interest S, I wondered what I should do if/when I get voicemail (I've always gotten voicemail when calling girls for the first time). She said that I was obviously calling to ask for a date and I wouldn't want to just trick her into calling me back, so should just casually ask on the voicemail if it comes up. It seemed like a logical idea at the time.

So now it's over a day later, and I've heard nothing. I imagine that if a girl who wanted to go on a date got the message, then she could find 3 minutes to call me back. Instead, I just induced the most annoying part of dating: being ignored instead of receiving a straight answer. In hindsight, the Voicemail Date was an awful idea. I should have just asked to be called back and if that doesn't work twice, then I'm done.

But really, does it matter? She's going to say no either way. It may be true that I just want my chances with a new girl to last, since I seldomly meet them. In fact, that's probably it, but I'm still not making the same mistake.

What about you? Do you have a certain method for asking someone out? Or do you let your phone go to voicemail when someone calls for the first time?

The First Day of Fall

I can't believe it's the first day of fall.

The pluses:
-Autumn neighborhoods always look great
-I can wear more sweaters/use more of my wardrobe
-Football Season

The minuses:
-Way more unfortunate cold days
-I always seem to have less money around this time of year
-Where did all the girls in skirts go?

Since we had a ridiculously mild summer in Chicago, it almost feels like it's been fall since about July. Either way, it should be a good time.


So as I've insinuated, match.com has not been going swimmingly (sinking-ly?). So far, I've sent out 25 emails to girls. Some of which I've put a good amount of thought into without overdoing it, and other I just threw together but still made congenial. As of today, I've gotten zero replies. I'm not sure what the deal is. I've definitely sent out emails to different types of girls, too. From the dive bar girls to the former sorority girls, they disagree on everything except to show me interest. I just get the feeling that there are A LOT of guys on the site, and if you're an attractive, non-vapid girl, you could go on as many dates as you want. As for an only-funny-in-person-not-online normal guy who's not over 5'10: different story. I'll keep trying with it, but this 3-month subscription can't seem to end soon enough.

On the other hand, I asked the question last post if it's acceptable to stop trying to meet girls in person while being an online dating member. Well my current 0 for 25 streak has forced me to say no, and I went to a party with my friend Jay on Saturday. Of the 30 or so people there, I knew three, so I had my work cut out for me. After a while (and a few beers), I got comfortable enough to make friends with some random guys and girls without my friends around. For the larger portion of the night, though, I had my eye on a girl with pretty brown eyes.

Now I'd like to say that I walked up to her and said a witty comment that immediately got her laughing. Not the case. Instead, I talked to her friend who then introduced me. This girl was a combination of Brazilian and Jewish. Though a unique combination, let me tell you: it produces quite a good looking girl.

So the girl and I talked on and off for the next hour or so. I'll call her S in hopes that I can mention her again. At the end of the night, I asked for her number, which she gave me. Is it strange that she didn't take mine down, but instead just had me call her phone to make the number show?

The only problem of the night was that I'm not the most mysterious/intriguing person. Instead of leaving it at "I'll call you" I said "Yeah, I'll probably call you Saturday." So now that I'm not worried about getting this number (because I have it), the worry is now at if she picks up the phone when I call. Calling girls and not getting replies is the most annoying part of dating to me. Hopefully this works out so I can worry about if she'll cancel on a set date.

Have you ever gotten someone's number but not received a retuned call? Or if you're a girl, have you ever done this? Is it to be polite or to let the guy save face in front of his friends?